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Losing my head

Granny (Looney Tunes)

Granny (Looney Tunes) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Genetics can be a real kick in the pants, can’t it? Take for instance my cute, little grandmas…they were both quite short. I was lucky enough to inherit every bit of that trait, then minus an inch for good measure. Yay for me! Good thing my brother inherited the random tall gene. That would have been awkward, had it been the other way around.

While I’m talking about my Grandmas, let’s call them Grandma Laughs and Granny Quiet. My Mom’s mom was known for her ability to laugh until she started choking. We all worried a little even though we were laughing harder because of her guffaws. I grew up just down the street from her. I remember her laughing until her sides hurt when my brother said admiringly “Nice buns, Grandma!” They were white…her buns…I mean her bread buns…C’mon!

Granny Quiet lived 3 provinces away and, as a result, I didn’t get to know her very well and she always seemed so…. quiet. It could have been that either she was a gentle spirit, who didn’t need to speak much to be understood, or it was the fact that I actually didn’t understand her at all.   She did speak predominantly in a language that I didn’t know.

As I get older, I wonder which one I take after. Grandma Laughs was a spry old gal who had a keen wit about her until she started to fade in her 80’s. I remember the time The Reverend and I were visiting and she told me that my aunt and uncle would be dropping by. I’m not sure who was slower to catch on that they weren’t actually coming because they didn’t know that we were waiting for them. It very well could have been me. Unfortunately, she spent a great many years unable to communicate.

Granny Quiet may have not been able to get a word in edgewise with well over 150 descendants on her roster. Her mind was sharp right until the end of her days. I’m pretty sure that after that many children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, great-great grandchildren etc I would be a crazy loon. Obviously, I probably take after Grandma Laughs. Not that she was crazy. She wasn’t, but she also didn’t have that many people to keep track of.

See? I wonder about which side of the tree I’ll take after, because I can’t remember the names of my children, some days. When I want to get a specific child’s attention, I go through all four of the names, plus a few other names I thought of before they were born. I’m pretty sure I left one of them at church a while back but they ended up at home, so that’s good. Yesterday, we went to the wrong place for softball practice because I forgot to check my text messages (chronic habit) and then when we got to the right place I remembered that I forgot all the equipment like the required ball, bat and glove. I sent Belle to get them because I figured she should pay the price for forgetting it too. What? We live across the alley from the ball diamonds. I didn’t think it was that mean until I realized that she didn’t know where I put the equipment. Sigh! I’m pretty sure I paid the higher price for my forgetfulness.

I hope it’s just a mom-of-four thing and not the onset of dementia happening here. I should probably do more puzzles, like Granny Quiet.

I hate puzzles.

I suppose my kids have it coming to them. Me, going crazy, that is. For years they’ve tried to undo me. They just think I’m nuts right now. In reality it’s a devious plan to make them do my bidding…

Mwah ha haaaa!

They should be worried that I have longevity on both sides.


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